And it begins…

So I’ve never written a blog before so bare with me if you’re reading this. Mostly I just want a place to put down my thoughts, worries, and all that jazz. Right now what’s bothering me is thinking about my ex boyfriend. We broke up about 2 years ago, but it still bothers me. I guess my whole issue is that I’ve never fallen in love with someone so hard. Cared so much about a person and would do anything for them just to be dumped like it was no skin off his back. We live in the same town so I see him every now and then driving, at restaurants, the┬ámovies etc. He always acts like he doesn’t know me; ignores me. I have a great boyfriend now that treats me with respect, compassion, and genuinely cares about me. But I can’t get my ex out of my head. I think about when we were together and about how he wasn’t a good boyfriend at all. Always put himself first, never thought of what I wanted, and would always rather go have a beer with his buddies rather than hang out with me. I think the way he broke it off with me plays into why I feel the way I do now. Everything seemed fine with us and then he said he needed a break. Then after stringing me along for 2 weeks told me that he didn’t want to date anyone at that time, but only wanted to date me when he was ready again. Mind you, we’d been dating for 8 months at that point. Then after he told me he only wanted to date me when he was ready, he never talked to me again. It broke my heart. As stupid as it sounds, that’s what happened. I was head over heels in love with that idiot. I think he ruined love for me. I don’t think I’ll ever feel as passionate about someone as I did about him. Never be so in love with someone, but I think that’s ok. It wasn’t a great relationship, but it was fun while it lasted. We did fun things, travelled some, and laughed. I’m not bitter about it. I think mostly I just miss that passionate love I had for him. I love my current boyfriend, but I don’t see myself ever being so passionate and crazy about someone again. I guess I can be ok with that as long as I’m happy.


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